Today is Valentine’s day, and I’m finding there’s a great divide of couples vs. singles. It’s either spending $40 on roses that would otherwise cost ten, or it’s ‘Fuck Valentine’s Day!’
What about finding an in between?
I remember being in elementary school, and going through my little box of Valentine’s to give out. Each one chosen specifically for each person, and of course, saving the best one for the boy I had a crush on. Whoever it was that week. I miss those days where there weren’t mass amounts of pressure to either find a date, or make it a super expensive significant night with a partner. I think my most memorable Valentine’s Day was in grade 11 or 12 where my best friend and I went driving around downtown giving homeless people candy. I have no idea where this idea came from, but we didn’t really give a shit that we were single, and wanted to do something fun. Granted, homeless people maybe don’t need or want candy, but they seemed touched at the gesture. I still think of this every year when Valentine’s Day rolls around.
I also lost someone very close to me around this date as well, so there’s always sort of a bittersweet tinge to these days. In a way though, it makes me want to give and show love even more. Single or not. There’s no need to hate the happy couples or respond in jealousies to them having nights out. Leave them be. And you also don’t have to want to murder cupid and all he stands for. Treat yourself. Or better yet, treat someone else who may not be expecting any love on this day. I promise it’ll make you both smile.
Go to a yoga class, give candy to the homeless, check out a local burlesque show, or dance party at a dive bar. These are all things that are most definitely happening in your city, because they are in mine. If you can’t bear to have a night out cause of a recent broken heart or for other reasons, throw on some Nina Simone and Lykke Li, light some candles, and bond with those beautiful women over loves lost.
“Holding anger in your heart is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.”
Let go of Valentine’s hostilities and enjoy it! Minus all the material expectations and bright pink grocery store aisles, it’s a pretty lovely idea if you think about it. So listen to some love songs, do something sweet for a partner that isn’t about money or how good it’ll look on Instagram, take an unexpected friend out dancing, and make it a day of love. Whatever that means to you.